


The Heart Of The Sea

by nico_neo



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fantasy, How Do I Tag This, I might spoil something if i tag more, Inspired by the movie In The Heart Of The Sea, M/M, Mutual Pining, Sailors, Whalers - Freeform, Whales, cabin boy Jaemin, cabin boy Jeno
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-27
Updated: 2019-07-27
Packaged: 2020-07-23 00:00:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,775
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20000641
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nico_neo/pseuds/nico_neo
Summary: The Heart Of The Sea, newly rebuilt whaling ship, ready to sail. Costed thousands to be in shape again, yielding millions once whale oil would fill dozens of barils in the boat’s hold.Jaemin ended up being part of an adventure, he didn’t know, would change his life forever.





	The Heart Of The Sea

**Author's Note:**

> I watched the movie In The Heart Of The Sea a few weeks ago and all of this happened... not my fault
> 
> Enjoy!

“Dad…?”

The man, a honey colored beard embellishing his face and long hair of the same color, tied in a manbun, turned towards the ten-year-old boy.

The little boy was playing with a wood-shaped whale, but his eyes, wide and filled with curiosity, were looking at him.

“What is it, Daemin?”

“Can you tell me the white whale story, now?” the kid asked.

At that, the man’s jaw clenched. He shut his eyes tightly and sighed.

“No.” he simply said.

“But why?” Daemin whined.

“You’re not old enough. And I don’t want to talk about it.”

“But I’m a big boy now! Daad!” the kid had teary eyes.

“I don’t want to talk about it!” the honey-haired shouted, which made the kid fully cry.

Daemin threw the wooden whale at his father’s face before running out of the living room, sobbing.

The honey-haired bent down to grab the toy, wriggling it between his hands. At some point, his eyes became teary. He sniffed, blinking the tear from his eyes. He put the whale on the table and got out of the room, going downstairs, a maid running to him.

“Mister Jaemin-”

“I’m going to the port, please keep an eye on Daemin.” he simply said, grabbing an old jacket.

The door closed behind him with a loud noise.

The way to the port wasn’t long, only a few minutes walk. The port was quiet, the only sound Jaemin could hear was the crashing of the waves on the boat’s hulls, or against the rocks. The numerous boats were floating, peacefully. Seeing it like that, nobody would guess that during the days, and for several months or years, these boats were sailing the blue sea and killing gigantic, but innocent and peaceful creatures for the sake of money.

Jaemin walked up to the pontoon, where the view to the sea was the best. Where you could see the endless extent of the ocean.

The man sat down, legs hanging above the water. If he wanted, he could put his feet in.

The moon was reflecting on the deep blue water, creating a halo. Jaemin could see his reflection in the water, but he quickly averted his eyes from it.

“Where are you now? Did you find a safe place? That’s why you’re not coming back?” his hoarse, filled with sadness, voice spoke in the silence of the night.

A wave crashing on the few rocks answered him. But nothing else. With a lump forming in his throat, Jaemin spoke again.

“You said you’ll come back sometimes… But it’s been years.” He hold back a sob. “Are you even still alive?”

Another wave answered him.

“Daemin… He asked me about… about that day. When the Heart Of The Sea drowned. I told him I didn’t want to talk about it.” he made a pause. “He loves whales, you know. I’m pretty sure he would love all the stories you must keep to yourself.” the ones that don’t involve blood or death was left unsaid. “I’m pretty sure he would adore you.”

The first tear ran down his face, finishing her race in the water at his feet.

“You said… you said you’ll come back again. See if humans changed. But it’s been twenty years now… Will I ever see you again?”

His tears, falling in the sea were a quiet music in the dark night. The waves seemed to have calmed down, because the only sounds he could hear were his sobs and his tears.

“I miss you, Jen. I miss you so much.”

Then, he heard it.

Far away, at the beginning. So silent Jaemin thought he was hallucinating. But it became clearer, closer. Now, Jaemin could hear it properly. It seemed to handle all the pain, the sadness and the longing within it.

It was a song.

And then, he saw it.

It seemed so tiny from afar, but Jaemin knew how impressive seen from nearby it was.

The fin. Slowly disappearing again in the dark sea. But the song remained, filling Jaemin’s ears.

More tears and sobs passed through his lips. His heart felt lighter yet so heavy. The feeling of missing, of longing only grew stronger the more he heard them, the more he heard him.

And, suddenly, Jaemin found himself remembering, twenty years ago.

———————

  
The Heart Of The Sea, newly rebuilt whaling ship, ready to sail. Costed thousands to be in shape again, yielding millions once whale oil would fill dozens of barils in the boat’s hold.

Jaemin ended up being part of an adventure, he didn’t know, would change his life forever. Killing whales was the number one business, conquering the seaworld was the dream of every boy, teen and man, and the whalers made that seem possible. Getting oil, going back to land, earning money. The job seemed fair to Jaemin. If it means going away from his hellhole of an orphanage, then so be it.

It was the morning, but the sea was already over-active, water drops flying on the deck and into their faces, as Jaemin was pulling on ropes, hoisting the sails in place.

The wind cried in Jaemin’s ears, and he quickly pulled a beanie out of his pant’s pocket, and put it on his head, welcoming the little of warmth he could get. His white nylon shirt was sticking to his body because of the water, and he wished he had bring a jacket.

The others ship boys were screaming, tackling at a task, sweeping the floor.

Eventually, the captain, first mate and second mate arrived on the ship. After their speak, with a captain that didn’t seem to know a lot about captainship and whaling, they hoisted the sails, pulled up the anchor, and let the wind guide them to the unknown.

During dinner - watered potatoes and vegetables, to be honest it looked like vomit - First mate Jaehyun went down in the crew quarters, giving them rules about their jobs for the next months.

Jaemin didn’t really listen, his stomach was doing summersaults, and he felt like he’ll throw up his dinner if he didn’t get out quick.

First mate Jaehyun left at the moment Jaemin sat back down, feeling his legs couldn’t support him anymore. His head fell on his arms and he mustered all his courage to not throw up right here, right now.

He felt a tap on his shoulder. Slowly, he lifted his head. A young boy, probably his age, with black hair and deep brown eyes was looking at him. His face was emotionless.

“Yeah?” Jaemin croaked out. And he immediately regretted it.

“Come to the deck with me.”

  
Feeling fresh hair on his face made Jaemin feel slightly better. But his envy to vomit his stomach and guts was still here.

The boy was just looking at him, expectantly. As if he was just waiting for Jaemin to throw up.

“It’s okay to be sea sick you know. I have a good way to make it pass.”

Before Jaemin could even utter a word, the boy threw him overboard, only grabbing his ankles to not let him fall. The honey-haired screamed. The water was way too close.

“Are you fucking crazy, let me up!”

“It’ll be so simple for the sea to eat you up.” The boy smirked.

“Put me fucking up!”

And the boy listened, bringing him back on the deck, his eyes filled with amusement as he was looking at Jaemin.

“Feel better?”

Jaemin’s only answer was to throw up.

  
(“Now that I threw up on your shoes, maybe I can know your name.”

“Jeno. Lee Jeno.”

“Jaemin. Na Jaemin.”

“Well, Na Jaemin, please don’t throw up on my shoes again.”)

  
The first big difficulty they encounter happened a few days after their departure, when their captain, against First mate Jaehyun advices, decided to ride the length of a storm rather than bypass it like advised.

Since the ship was gaining speed, thanks to the numerous sails they spent minutes hoisting, they were getting closer to the storm faster. Too fast. And by the time, Jaehyun and the captain stopped arguing, it was too late.

“We are sailing with eight knots. The storm moves even faster.” Taeyong, Second mate, told the captain.

“If this crew can not handle a little wind, we already lost!” the captain shouted to Jaehyun and Taeyong.

Taeyong clenched his jaw before turning to the crew, and shouted.

“Severe weather ahead. Make sure everything is lashed!”

The first big waves came down, crashing on the boat and watering the deck. The boat was pitching from side the side, and anyone who didn’t grab something to stay put was flying from another end of the ship to the other.

And Jaemin would have probably fall overboard if it wasn’t for Jeno grabbing his hand.

“Hold on tight to the shrouds!” Jeno shouted at him over the rage cry of the waves and the thunder.

And Jaemin never grabbed something so tight in his entire life. Saying he wasn’t scared would be lying.

Jeno stayed close to him, grasping tightly on the ropes, his fingers turning white.

At the horizon, Jaemin saw one, huge, gigantic, wave coming their way, and his eyes widened at its view. Everyone’s stare was on the upcoming wave, and when Jeno wriggled next to him, Jaemin finally settled eyes on him. Jeno’s hair was sticking to his forehead because of the water, and he was climbing higher on the shrouds. He looked down at Jaemin, water drops falling from his eyelashes.

“The ship’s probably going to capsize. Climb higher to not be submerged by the water.” he said. “Come on!” he added when Jaemin didn’t move.

Jaemin just had time to reach Jeno’s level before the wave came, crashing down and flooding the boat. He heard people screaming, falling. Jaehyun shouting at them to hold on tight.

One of the rescue boat untied and went flying on the deck before falling into the sea, crushed by its power.

Jeno and Jaemin had a hard time holding on, Jeno almost lose his grip when the ship suffered from a harsh keeling over, quickly getting his grip back together when it rocked on the other side.

One of the sails hit another huge wave, and Jaemin heard Jaehyun shouting to Taeyong to cut the ropes holding it in order to maintain the ship on balance. Once cut, the water at their feet left the boat as he was getting back upright.

Jeno and Jaemin stayed up until everything calmed down. From there, Jaemin saw Jaehyun sending a harsh glance to their captain.

As the rain was slowly left behind, Jeno turned to look at Jaemin.

“We can go down now, it settled down. We have the hold to clean.” the black-haired said, slowly getting down.

Jaemin followed, his hands aching and legs wobbling.

  
(The next morning, the captain asked to go back to land for repairing, while Jaehyun disagreed. They couldn’t go back to land now. Jaemin simply listened, sweeping the deck clean as Jeno was organizing the mess the storm made.

They were not making a U-turn to land, they were going on with their road.)

  
It’s been weeks they were sailing, probably a month, maybe more. Jaemin didn’t know. He didn’t have any notion of time.

And it has also been weeks Jaemin didn’t get a good night of sleep. He would jerk away in the middle of the night while most of the others were snoring, not bothered by the movements of the sea making the ship move.

But Jaemin didn’t know if what was keeping him awake was the sea or… fear.

Fear of the unknown.

Fear of what they’ll discover.

Fear of not making it out alive.

He didn’t know how he was making it through his days.

“You should sleep.” a voice whispered, next to him.

Jaemin turned his head, breathing uneven and sweat drenching his body, to look at the owner of the voice.

Slumped against the wood of the ship’s hold, his head resting against it, his hands playing with what seemed to be a whale tooth, was Jeno. He was set back compared to the others, and Jaemin wanted to come closer to him, to feel less oppressed by the presence of the others.

The honey-haired gulped down, trying to catch back his breathing.

“Jaem, come next to me.” Jeno said, quietly when he noticed the gesture.

Jaemin stood up on wobbly legs, and made his way to Jeno, trying to not wake up the others. When he reached Jeno, the black haired made room for him and Jaemin sat down, head low.

Jeno was looking at him, silently, but Jaemin could feel his gaze burning his skin.

“It’s okay to be scared, you know.” Jeno finally said, which made Jaemin look at him. Jeno’s face wasn’t judgmental, he couldn’t read his eyes but the black haired had a small smile on his face. “Humans are scared of what they don’t know. Simple as that.”

“Aren’t you scared?” Jaemin asked him.

Jeno simply shrugged, and his gaze settled down on the white tooth in his hands. They didn’t talk after that, Jeno silently mentioned to him to fall back asleep, and strangely, Jaemin felt sleep gaining him.

When his head jerked down, him being half awake half sleeping, Jeno pushed it down on his shoulder with one of his hand. In his sleepy state, Jaemin made himself comfortable against the other boy, feeling Jeno’s breath on the top of his head. Jaemin exhaled, feeling oddly at peace.

Jeno watched him falling asleep for a few seconds, before finally muterring.

“I can’t be scared of what I already know.”

The next day, they caught their first whale.

When he got back on the deck, the scent of death, putrefaction was filling the air. It made Jaemin want to throw up. Some men were cutting the meat, others were putting it inside boiling water, and others were collecting the oil, inside the whale’s guts.

“Captain! We can’t reach more.” one of the men said.

“Keep digging.” the captain answered.

“But we can’t get down there.”

“Then, find someone who can.”

One of the men’s gaze fell on Jaemin.

“Hey! Na! Kiddo, come here.” he said.

Jaemin turned around.

“Come here I said!”

Jaemin sighed, before making his way towards them. First mate Jaehyun, joined them.

“You going down I guess?” Jaehyun asked him.

The honey-haired looked at the whale, then back at Jaehyun again.

“I can’t. Sorry, I can’t.” he said, looking at the whale, disgust filling his guts.

“Come down or we’ll make you sleep down there.” one of the men grunted.

Jaemin gulped, looking at Jaehyun again.

“Come on, the most valuable is down there.” the First mate smiled.

At the corner of his eyes, Jaemin saw Jeno. The black haired was looking at them, face closed and eyes dark. When he noticed Jaemin looking at him, he held his gaze before turning around, continuing to sweep the floor.

Jaemin turned around with a sigh. One of the men handed him a small piece of rope, tied together.

“Place this between your teeth. The smell is worse than Satan’s asshole.” he laughed, crudely.

And then, Jaemin was pushed inside the whale’s guts, through the blowhole.

  
At night, Jaemin couldn’t sleep. He still smelled the scent of guts and death on him even though he managed to clean himself. And, whenever he closed his eyes, the events from the afternoon were rolling behind his closed eyelids.

His bloodied hands because of the rowing. The harpoon Jaehyun threw into the water, hitting the whale’s body right away. The clear blue water turning deep read because of the blood.The sadness Jaemin felt when the metallic weapon reached its target. The disgust he felt seeing the animal floating on the water, surrounded by a red halo, lifeless.

Disgusted by what humans can do for the sake of money and power.

He practically didn’t see Jeno today. Mostly because he was inside a whale but even when they were rowing, Jeno was on the captain’s bark. The only time he saw him today was before being pushed to search for oil. Otherwise, even during dinner, he didn’t see the boy. Not that Jaemin really ate dinner anyway, way too disgust to even try to eat something, not risking to throw it up a few minutes after.

So, when Jaemin turned on his left side, he was surprised to see Jeno slumped at his usual spot, looking at him. Jaemin lifted himself up, walking the few centimeters that separated him from the black-haired boy. Jeno didn’t say anything, just looked at him doing his things.

When Jaemin sat down again, their shoulders were touching, as usual. Jaemin was already looking at him when their eyes met.

“I didn’t see you a lot today, are you okay?” Jaemin asked.

Jeno simply shrugged.

From the weeks they’ve known each other, Jaemin noticed Jeno wasn’t that much of a talker. He just spoke if he needed to. Otherwise, he was executing orders in silence. If Jaemin recalls right, the only times he heard Jeno speak were during their first meeting, during the storm, or when they were talking before sleeping at night.

Jeno was only talking to Jaemin.

That made Jaemin feel warm, and a smile broke out on his face. Jeno looked at him with a raised eyebrow.

“What is making you smile, huh?” he teased the younger.

“That now that I think about it, I am the only person you’re really talking to. Otherwise, I don’t see you speak at all.” Jaemin explained.

Jeno chuckled, his shoulders shaking with the noise and a small smile appeared on his face.

“Maybe because you’re the only one worth talking to on this ship.” he said.

Jaemin’s smile widened and he even felt his cheeks blushing. He was glad the hold was too dark for Jeno to see properly.

“You didn’t answer me, though.” the honey-haired pouted.

Jeno looked back at him, then sighed. His hands were still playing with the whale tooth.

“I don’t know.” Jeno eventually said. “I can’t explain how I feel.”

“Disgusted?”

“I guess a part of me is.” the older agreed. “I feel like it’s a part of me that’s being killed at the same time.”

Jaemin decided to let the subject go, focusing instead on the object in Jeno’s hand.

“What’s that?” he asked, pointing to the tooth.

It was knotted with a leather lash, enabling to put it as a necklace.

Jeno put the tooth at eye view, allowing Jaemin to take a closer look at it. He was looking at it as if he didn’t know what is was either.

“It’s a whale tooth.” Jeno stated. “I don’t know where it comes from, though. I had it for as long as I can remember.”

“Maybe your parents?”

From what Jaemin knew, Jeno was an orphan as well. Maybe the necklace was the last thing his parents gave him.

Jeno shrugged again, putting the lash around his neck, the tooth displaying on his white skin, visible thanks to his two buttons that were unbuttoned at the top of his shirt.

“I’ll never know anyway.” he added, looking again at Jaemin. “We should sleep.”

“Can I stay here?” Jaemin asked, not really thinking twice.

“As if you were waiting for my permission.” Jeno retorted.

Jaemin giggled and made himself comfortable, lying down, back facing Jeno.

“You still stink, though.” Jeno’s voice whispered.

“What a way to be nice, Jeno.”

“I saw you looking at your clothes all over, a few minutes ago.”

“Shut up.”

  
(“I was joking, the smell was gone.” Jeno told him, the next morning, as Jaemin was sweeping the floor.

“Of course it was gone, I managed to clean myself, contrary to someone else.” the younger poked his tongue out.

Jeno throw water from the bucket on Jaemin’s face with his broom.)

  
It’s been four months since they’ve last seen a whale.

The hold was getting emptier and emptier.

The captain of their ship was getting more and more frustrated as the Atlantic Ocean wasn’t holding any more whales for them to chase.

The only positive point for Jaemin was Jeno. By his presence only, Jaemin felt less alone. They couldn’t really talk during the day, executing orders there and there, but when the night came, they’ll meet each other at Jeno’s usual spot, slumped against each other, Jeno recalling stories to Jaemin.

Stories involving whales.

The security of the dark night also allowed Jaemin to let himself go, attentive to Jeno’s boundaries. But Jeno didn’t seem to mind, so, more than once, Jaemin’s head ended on Jeno’s shoulder, or in the crook of his neck, closely listening to the story the other was narrating.

Since a few weeks, Jeno was carving in a wood piece he found in the hold. His little knife shaping the wood. It didn’t have a final form yet, or Jaemin really couldn’t say what it looked like. And Jeno didn’t want to tell him what he was sculpting, either.

That night, as Jeno was slowly shaping the wood piece, he was also telling Jaemin a story.

“A long time ago, there was a whale. She was alone at first, her kind scattered around the oceans. So, in order to find back her family, she travelled. She travelled for days and days. But she didn’t found any other whale.” Jeno’s knife cut a sharp piece of wood. “She felt sad, so sad and alone. Therefore, she started singing. Mostly to herself, to ease her pain and loneliness. She traveled the sea, still singing. Until one day,” another sharp cut into the wood. “Until one day, her song got an answer.” Jeno stopped, looking at Jaemin.

The younger had his head in the crook of his neck, but his eyes were on him, closely listening to the tale.

“Who answered?” Jaemin asked, eyes and voice filled with interest and curiosity. “Was it another whale?”

Jeno smiled but shook his head, his hands started sculpting again.

“It wasn’t a whale. It was a human.” he revealed. “To discover who was answering her, the whale went up to the surface after a long time of staying in the dark depths of the ocean. And then, she saw him. The human. Lost in the middle of the ocean, on a raft. The whale got closer. The human was lost, for sure. The human was still singing, so the whale sang with him. The man was amazed by seeing the whale of course, but never did he stop singing. So, to help him find his road again, the whale helped him go back home.”

“Did she see the human again?” Jaemin wondered.

Jeno’s jaw suddenly clenched, and his movements on the wood became even sharper, angrier.

“Yes. She saw him again, but this time, the human wasn’t on a raft anymore. He was sailing on a huge ship, with other humans with him. And when the whale came to the surface to welcome what she thought was an old friend, the human wasn’t singing anymore. Instead, he was throwing harpoons at her, hurting her, creating scars on her body. The only thing she could do was swim away, going back to the deep depths of the ocean.”

“What happened after?”

“She found some of her kind. So, she stayed with them. Still hidden. Some were going back to the surface sometimes, but, usually, they weren’t seen anymore after that. And the whales never stopped singing.” Jeno’s hand stopped moving, and he lifted the sculpture for both him and Jaemin to be able to see.

“The only thing the whale wanted was to have a friend and not be alone anymore. And this is how the human thanked her. By killing them, when they helped them find their way back home.”

Here, in Jeno’s hand, was a wooden-shaped whale.

  
(“You know, Jaemin. The world seems pretty sad when you stop to think that there are ninety feet long animals, swimming around and singing sad songs because humans are slowly killing them one by one to prove themselves stronger.” Jeno told him the same night, as they were lying down, facing each other, the wood whale set down in between them. As if it was watching after them.)

A few nights later, Jaemin was laying restless besides Jeno. The other wasn’t sleeping either, Jaemin knew it because he saw the black haired’s fingers playing with the whale figure he finished sculpting a few days prior.

Jaemin couldn’t sleep because their captain decided to head into the middle of the ocean after some Spanish man during their break in Ecuador told him there was a pack of whales hiding there.

“What’s on your mind?” Jeno’s voice broke Jaemin’s trail of thoughts with a soft, tired voice.

“The captain’s choice. Why trusting a man he doesn’t know and who could easily lie?” the honey-haired asked.

Jeno seemed to always have an answer, anyway. So, anytime Jaemin asked something, he felt listened.

“Because he’s avid for money and fame. So he trusts whoever and whatever concerning whales. Because whales are a price to him. He won’t stop until he gets his hands on it.”

Jaemin turned on his side, now facing Jeno, who turned as well when he noticed Jaemin doing so. They were now face to face and Jaemin lost himself in Jeno’s eyes, that were as deep as the ocean and seemed to hold centuries of stories.

“Do you think we will find whales out there?”

Jeno put the shaped whale above their heads, and looked at Jaemin again.

“I think so.” he answered.

“What will happen if we don’t?”

“Hopefully Jaehyun or Taeyong will success to knock some senses into the captain. And we’ll go back home. Hold empty, but at least, the lowest harm would have been done.”

Jaemin nodded slowly.

“You seem to have a special link with whales.” he told Jeno, and felt his cheeks blushing when the only thing Jeno did was to look intensely at him. “I mean… It’s like you can feel what they feel, what they felt centuries ago. It’s like… I don’t know. It’s like you were a whale yourself.”

Jeno raised an eyebrow, eyes wide with astonishment.

“That’s dumb I know but, it feels like it sometimes. With all the stories you’re telling.” Jaemin tried to hide his reddened cheeks, but Jeno’s hands prevent him to do so.

The black-haired’s hand was on his cheek and his finger was tracing Jaemin’s skin softly. But his gaze seemed lost. And Jaemin was afraid to disturb him.

They were close, as usual, their foreheads were practically touching and Jaemin could feel Jeno’s breath on his face.

Finally, Jeno’s eyes met Jaemin’s.

“Jaemin… Do you trust me?” he asked.

“Of course.” the younger answered right away. “Do you?”

“You are the only one on this forsaken boat I’ll trust with my life and secrets.” Jeno answered.

Jaemin felt himself blush again, but a smile appeared on his face. Jeno mirrored it, even thought it was smaller, it was still as beautiful.

“Can I kiss you?” Jeno asked.

“I said I trust you, didn’t I?” Jaemin smirked.

Jeno didn’t wait and dived on the younger shaped lips, wiping his smirk away.

As their kiss deepened, Jaemin couldn’t help but notice and think.

Jeno tasted like the sea.

His kisses were as fierce as a raging storm in the middle of the ocean, but were also as soft and soothing as the foam sliding on the sand.

Jeno is the sea.

  
(“Can I tell you something?” the older whispered a few minutes later, after they stopped kissing after what felt like hours and were now on the verge of falling asleep.

“Hmm?” Jaemin croaked out, groggily.

“There are whales where we are going. But there is something else. Something bigger.”

“What something?”

“An old friend.”)

  
Days they were sailing, and the only thing they were seeing was a vast expanse of a calm, pacific blue water.

But no question to turn back, the captain, and even First Mate Jaehyun, were too blinded by greed for that.

If they weren’t interacting that much during the day, Jaemin and Jeno found their way back to each other’s embrace when the night comes and that sleep took over the others cabin boys.

On one night, Jeno related that, centuries ago, men were too afraid to sail in unknown waters. Too afraid to fall from the brink. Thinking the Earth was flat. Some stories were recounting that some men fell into the deep depths or the Earth, eaten by the flames of Hell. Other stories recalled lost sailors, saved and took back home by huge animals.

Whales.

And Jaemin couldn’t help but think, if men were afraid of sailing to the brink. Them, on the other hand, were heading towards insanity rim.

The crew was starting to talk, to whisper. They were unhappy with the decision that has been taken.

Until, the next day, they finally saw what they were coming for.

“Mister Jung! I see the white waters!”

“Where?!”

“At the port side!”

“Place the boats in the water!” Jaehyun yelled at the crew.

Jaemin ran at the task, and he saw Jeno doing the same thing at the other side of the ship.

The men were screaming in joy, smiles taking place on their faces.

But Jaemin had a bad feeling.

And he hated that.

They all went down on the boats, and Jaemin was surprised to see Jeno taking place next to him on the rows. Jaemin looked at him curiously but Jeno only gave him a small smile.

The older had his face shut again, eyes cold and angry.

Just like the first time they caught a whale.

The whales were restless, troubled. They were swimming away from them, smelling the danger.

First Mate Jaehyun was at the tip of the boat, harpoon in hand. When a whale passed right next to them, he threw it on the animal, reaching his goal.

When the boat moved violently forward, Jaemin sent a panicked glance to Jeno. The black-haired was looking on the side, towards the sea. He furtively looked at Jaemin. He didn’t seem scared, as if he knew what was going to happen.

His eyes were shining with an unknown gleam to Jaemin. And it was as if he felt sorry.

The boat moved again.

“Do not let them chew in his veins!” Jaehyun yelled at them, happy smile on his face.

Jeno moved closer to Jaemin.

“Jaem, hold your breath.” he told the younger.

The honey-haired didn’t have time to ask why that the boat violently jerked upwards, making them fall into the cold water, between the mess of ropes and oars.

Quickly getting back to the surface, Jaemin took a deep breath in, trying to see where everyone else was. He found Jeno in no time, the older swimming to him. The water was making his hair stick to his forehead but the water drops falling from his eyelashes made them seem longer than actual. He was breathtaking.

“You alright?” Jeno asked when he reached him.

Jaemin could only nod, before a huge shadow overtook them. And when he looked forward, the sun was replaced by a huge, white tailfin, falling back into the water.

He never saw a fin this gigantic. It was almost three time the size of the other whales.

What was that?

He turned to look at Jeno. The other was looking at the vanishing fin with a clenched jaw. But he didn’t seem scared. Instead, he looked like he was used to it.

Jaehyun hurried them to get the boat back up, and to make their way back to the ship, and to hurry.

With a beating heart, Jaemin felt like he never rowed so fast in his entire life.

“Sail towards the pack!” Jaehyun roared to the navigator when they were inside the ship again.

They were getting on to repair the boat as well as they could, when another tremor made them lose their balance and fly to the ground.

The ship was moving on its own, but to the side, as if something was pushing it.

“The hell was that?!”

As everyone was starting to panic, Jaemin included, Jeno came to him.

“I’ll see what’s going on with the others, in the hold.” he told him, hands gripping Jaemin’s upper arms, tight. “Whatever happens, hold on. Tight.”

“Why are you telling me this?”

“Just do it, please.” Jeno pleaded. His eyes showing worry. But not for him…

“Okay.” Jaemin nodded.

Jeno nodded curtly, leaving a quick peck on the younger’s lips before running to the hold.

Jaemin could only do as Jeno said, the water splashing on the ship way too powerful over him.

When the boat finally seemed to settle, Jaemin saw it.

The white whale.

And it was angry.

“Give me the biggest harpoons!” Jaehyun’s voice snarled over the noise. “As long as I’m alive,” he said, tying three harpoons together. “He’s mine.” he went to the tip of the boat, ready to shoot his weapons.

The whale started to charge at them. The First Mate aimed, then shot, reaching his goal but not enough. And it seemed to make the whale angrier, as she jumped underwater, only lifting her tailfin to crashed it on the ship, crushing it like an ant.

The rope tied to the harpoons was getting shorter and shorter as the whale was going underwater, and soon, it created a chain reaction. The anchor flew across the ship, and Jaemin just had time to dive to the side to avoid it. Then, it made the main pole break and fall. And Jaemin slipped when the sail fell into the water, dragging Jaemin with it.

He had a hard time disentangling from it and going back to the surface, but he made it. And he could only watch the Heart Of The Sea tangling to the side, dangerously, almost ready to drown. Second Mate Taeyong’s boat came to view, and he was put up on it when they reached him.

“Get ready to abandon the ship!” the captain yelled.

“We won’t row back to the land!” Jaehyun retorted. “We must take the sails down and improvise.”

“Take everything you can carry!”

They all went back on the ship, taking what they could need as the night was setting, the sun hiding behind huge grey clouds. But the only thing Jaemin noticed was that Jeno wasn’t there.

Where was he?

He was pushed to get back to the task, but his mind wasn’t at ease.

“Come on Na! Give me those ropes!”

Fire started to spread on the wood when they all get on the boats. And soon enough, it blew up.

And the only person Jaemin could think about was Jeno.

“Jeno!” he yelled to the boat, hoping the other would appeared.

He yelled again, again and again, the flames getting to the water.

Until he heard one of the cabin boy yelling and shaking him.

“He’s there! He’s there!”

Jaemin frantically turned around, hovering above the water to hand a hand to the black-haired boy, who was swimming among the flames.

“Come on Jen!” he yelled again.

Jeno grabbed his hand, tightly, and with the help of the other cabin boy, they lifted him up into the boat.

“It’s okay we got you.”

And as they made eye contact for the first time since all of this happened, the Heart To The Sea blew to pieces, making them whip their heads around. Watching at what had been their home for the last months slowly disappear in the orange flames, in the night.

When Jaemin teared his eyes away, he looked back at Jeno, who also turned to look at him. The younger saw he was gripping on something. And when he reached to softly open Jeno’s palm, he found, safely protected, the wooden shaped whale. Jaemin couldn't help but smile, his fond gaze looking up at Jeno.

Jeno’s hand wriggeld in his own, and when Jaemin glanced down, the other had pushed the wood piece into Jaemin’s hand. Softly, carefully, closing Jaemin’s fingers around it, clasping the younger’s hands into his own, squeezing tight, protective.

Their foreheads drew closer, not giving a thought to all the people surrounding them. And, by their closeness, Jaemin noticed how uneven Jeno’s breathing was, and his face held some bruises, not big ones, but little enough to draw some blood and scars. Jaemin removed one of his hands from Jeno’s to clasp it back above it, his turn to squeeze it, softly and protectively.

“You, humans.” Jeno croaked out, voice hoarse and tired. “You need to stop trying to conquer what you can’t rule.”

The Heart To The Sea had drowned, consumed by the flames and the water. And the only thing they could do was to watch it happen.

Their three little boats were forming a triangle to keep close to each other, each having a small fire to keep them warm, even though it wasn’t enough. Jaemin had his beanie on, and was hopelessly looking at Jaehyun, Taeyong and their captain by turn. The captain was looking down on maps. Taeyong had his gaze lost and Jaehyun was looking over them.

Jeno was slumped against Jaemin’s side, his head in the younger’s neck, and his thin jacket wrapped over him. His arms were crossed on his chest, trying to keep himself the warmest. But he was shivering from time to time. Jaemin tried to share some warmth with him but it was useless.

The honey-haired looked down at him. Jeno had fallen asleep within seconds after speaking, drained. And Jaemin didn’t have the heart to wake him up, instead placing his head above his, cheek pressed against the black strands. However, the black-haired jerked awake when one of the cabin boy started to speak. He looked lost, his eyes puffed with sleep. Jaemin shot him a small smile and squeezed his knee.

“Captain, what will be our ration?”

The captain looked up to them, silence falling over the whispers with anticipation.

“Each will have fifty grams of biscuit per day. And half a glass of water.”

The whispers started again. And the one that went back was:

We’re all going to die.

Deep down, Jaemin was silently agreeing.

He felt something squeezing his hand on Jeno’s knee. It was Jeno’s hand. The other was looking at Jaemin with a small smile, but it didn’t reach his eyes.

Jaemin bumped their foreheads together, and they stayed like that. Jeno rubbing their nose from time to time, in a kind of eskimo kiss, making Jaemin chuckle. It was cute.

They were hoping to sail towards the Easter Island, to gain the land. It was at some thousands of nautical miles from where they were. The burning sun was their only ally for navigation.

Or maybe was it an enemy.

“We’ve been sailing South for twelve days.” the captain announced. “Sixth Southern latitude.”

“Does that mean we’ve been doing stand-still?” the men whispered between them.

Jaemin gulped, his throat feeling sore. He hid his head into Jeno’s neck, feeling desperate. Jeno placed a kiss on his forehead and squeezed his hand, clasped into his own.

“We’re cursed.” another man whispered.

Jaemin fell asleep, the sun making him more and more tired as days passed, Jeno’s calloused thumb tracing soothing circles on his hand.

That night, they experienced a storm. Taeyong was hurt in the head, leaving a deep cut, they lost two cabin boys, but Jaemin couldn’t erase what he saw.

He’s sure he saw the white whale.

Or maybe was he hallucinating.

“I’m good, I’m fine!” Taeyong kept saying to Jaehyun, like a mantra.

“Someone to give him water!” Jaehyun asked.

“No! No, no, no, I don’t need water. I don’t want water.”

Jaehyun forced the gobelet to Taeyong’s mouth, the other quickly gulping it down.

Jaemin watched the scene, worry and tenderness swinging in his body as he watched Jaehyun helping Taeyong lie down with softness and fondness in his gestures. The men were nattering they didn’t have enough water and they didn’t need to waste it to a half dead man. And Jaemin couldn’t help but imagine if it was Jeno in Taeyong’s place.

A shiver ran down his spine at the thought.

  
Thirty-four days since the Heart To The Sea disappeared into the water’s depths.

And finally, they saw a land at the horizon.

“Land!” Jaehyun yelled.

“Land!” the other men yelled as well.

Jaemin struggled to get up from his position, wanted to see with his own eyes if it was real. Jeno helped him by steading him, arms wrapped around his middle.

But the joy was cut short, when Jaehyun spotted something, in the water.

“Put the oars up!” he shouted. “I said, put the oars up, goddammit!”

“What’s wrong Mister Jung?” the captain asked, when he noticed the First Mate cleaning a shotgun barrel. “What are you doing?!”

“He followed us! All this time.” Jaehyun roared.

“I don’t see anything, though.” Jaemin whispered under his breath.

“Underwater.” Jeno’s voice answered him.

Not a second after Jeno spoke, the whale jumped out of the water, a few centimeters away from them, diving back down immediately. But she didn’t go nearer. And Jaehyun was ready to shot.

“Jaemin.” Jeno called him, but his eyes were fixed on any Jaehyun’s movement. “Do you trust me?”

The younger looked at him, curiously.

“Of course I trust you.”

“Good.”

And before Jaemin had time to react, Jeno was getting up, yelling at First Mate Jaehyun to not shoot.

“Lee come back here!” the captain roared. “What are you doing?”

Jeno didn’t answer. Instead, he dived into the water.

Jaemin’s eyes widened, and he couldn’t find himself to move a muscle. Too surprised.

But when the white whale dove after the black-haired, Jaemin, along with the rest of crew, wailed Jeno’s name.

The sea settled. Everything was silent, the only sound Jaemin could hear was his beating heart.

Until, taking a deep breath back, Jeno emerged from the water. The whale following suit.

But she seemed… calmer, soothed.

And Jeno was sitting on her back, looking at them with a shut face, eyes dark and harsh. His eyes flickered to Jaemin, calming for a second before they settled on the captain.

“Lee, what does that mea-”

“He’ll bring us back to land.” Jeno cut him off.

“What?!”

“See, captain,” Jeno giggled, humorlessly. “This is what happens when humans think they’re the stronger ones. When they think everything has to belong to them, when it hasn’t. He’ll bring us back to land. But what happened a few months ago will happen again and again until you realize you can’t rule this one kingdom. Consider yourself lucky.”

The black-haired slipped off the whale’s back and went back into the little boat, to a wide eyed and worried Jaemin. He sat next to him in silence, the whale lifting the boats on her back so effortlessly. He finally turned to Jaemin after a few seconds.

“You were right about me, Jaem.” he simply said.

Jaemin’s only response was to grab his collar and kiss him senseless.

  
Even if the white whale were sailing them back home, it didn’t stop their human needs.

Food.

Water.

They didn’t have any of these anymore.

Jaemin’s skin was so dry he felt like it could snap at any seconds. His lips were so chapped because of the salt of the water. Jeno was in the same state as him. As well as all the rest of the crew.

Jeno and Jaemin were both so weak they could hardly move. The only thing they could do was squeezing each other’s hand.

And wait.

“Jaem.” Jeno whispered, his throat way too dry to speak properly. He shook him, weakly. “Jaemin.” He frailly moved closer to the younger, only managing to move his upper body. One of his hand went up slowly to the honey-haired’s face, softly caressing his cheek with his calloused hand. “Jaem, baby, wake up. Land.”

Jaemin stirred slightly. And it took Jeno another brush of his thumb to his cheek for him to flutter his eyes open.

“What?” he croaked out.

“Land.”

He shifted his eyes forward. His vision was too blurry to see anything because of the sun blinding him, and also because of dehydration. He blinked a few time, trying to focus on the sight before him. After a few seconds, he made out the shape of boats… and he could see seagulls flying and singing above them.

Their little boats came to a stop, but the port seemed still so far away. Jaemin sensed Jeno moved next to him, the other bending over the sea with the little force he still had in his tired body and reached a hand in the water, the whale swimming beneath it. He muttered something Jaemin couldn’t really decipher, but it seemed like an acknowledgment. A thank you.

“What does this mean, Lee? The land is still far!” the hoarse voice of their captain broke the silence.

“He won’t go further, captain.” Jeno answered with disdain. “It’s give or take.”

They heard him growl, and roared at the ones who weren’t tired enough to row to the port. In their boat, it’s Jaehyun who devoted himself, stopping Jeno and Jaemin who were about to grab the roams. He softly smiled at them, doing so.

“I think it’s the least I could do. We owe you our life, Jeno.”

Jeno nodded curtly, his lips slightly curving upwards. Jaemin fell back down, lying on his side, tiredness coming back like a wave, making him fall asleep almost instantly.

When he woke up again, they had reached the port. And people were gathering around them, helping the crew to stand and walk. Jeno was waiting for him, calmly helping him out. People were looking at them, eyeing them curiously, muttering between them.

The crew was led to a inn, given meals and drinks. Jaemin tried to not stuff his stomach, but he couldn’t remember the last time he had a real meal, and he ended up eating it all. Having miss the feeling of having a full stomach. Jeno even laughed at him seeing him devour his meat, but Jaemin couldn’t bring himself to care.

At night, they were both lying down in the small bed of one of the room they were given, tiredly looking at each other through heavy eyelids. It’s Jeno who broke the silence.

“What are you going to do, after all of this?” he quietly asked.

Jaemin shrugged. He really had no idea.

A sudden thought crossed his head, and he worriedly looked at Jeno.

“And you? What are you going to do?”

Jeno kept silent. It made Jaemin heart heavy. Gulping down the lump in his throat, he closed his eyes to prevent his tears from falling. Before he fell asleep, he felt Jeno coming closer to him, their foreheads brushing and the older whispering in the quietness of the night.

“Whatever happens, I’ll come back. And by that time I hope humans would have changed.”

The next morning, Jeno was gone.

A wood-shaped whale resting on his pillow.

Jaemin swallowed back his tears.

  
________________

  
“I went back to the orphanage once I got my strength back and I was fully healed. I tried to get some little jobs here and there to earn a bit of money. But all of that aside, I was preparing something else. Prepared it for five years until I could reveal it.” Jaemin spoke, directed to the sea. “I published a book. A book with all the stories you narrated to me. I called it Stories Of A Lonely Singing Whale. I didn’t expect it to have such a success though. I just wanted to share to everyone the beautiful stories you shared to me. Money came flooding to me and I have more than I could ever dream of but… I’m not happy. Or not at my fullest. Because Daemin makes me really happy. Did I even tell you how I adopted him?”

“It was a few years after I published my book. He was an orphan. Living in the streets. He was only four. I couldn’t let him, I just… I don’t know. I couldn’t have lived with myself if I hadn’t take him in that night.... I did all the papers a few months later and here we are now. Officially my son. And he’s my world, he’s my happiness… But like I told you… I’m not totally happy. Something is missing… Someone.”

Jaemin’s gaze was locked on the dark blue sea, calmly moving and soothing him. But also bringing him pain.

And then, he heard it again.

The song.

It was much closer now, and the sea was moving more fiercely. But it could be the wind.

When one of his tears fell into the water, creating a halo, the water opened.

White skin coming out, contrasting with its darkness. A glistening whale tooth wrapped around a neck thanks to a dark leather lash. Deep brown eyes, holding centuries of history and wisdom, looking directly into his own.

Jaemin’s breath struck in his throat, and his tears fell without limit as the black-haired leant his elbows on the wood-made pontoon.

“Jaem?” a familiar voice he last heard twenty years ago, whispered.

Jaemin could only nod, unable to speak, sobs blocking his throat.

Jeno was in front of him, eye shining in the moonlight.

“Is it really you?” the honey-haired managed to croak out.

The other nodded, his eyes never leaving Jaemin’s.

“How long has it been?” Jeno asked, his wet fingertips feather lightly touching Jaemin’s light beard.

“Twenty years.”

“It felt like centuries to me…” Jeno muttered. “I didn’t think you’ll still be alive if I ever came up but…” he gulped. “I heard you sing. So I hoped I wasn’t wrong.”

His eyes watered, making Jaemin tightly grab the hand that was on his face, intertwining their fingers.

“I missed you, so much.”

Jeno pushed on his elbows to bring their foreheads together, making their nose touch and their breath meeting each other.

“I missed you too…”

“Will you leave again?” was the only thing Jaemin could find himself to ask.

The black-haired closed his eyes.

“They’re still trying to kill us, Jaem…” he muttered.

“After what happened twenty years ago, whale hunt was abolished -” Jaemin tried to resonate.

“Not everywhere, Jaem.” Jeno cut him off.

Jaemin clenched his jaw and shut his eyes close.

“I’m sorry. It’s too early, Jaem… Humans didn’t change. Only a small part of them.”

Deep down, Jaemin heard his heart break, and he wanted to be selfish. But another part of him, more rational, understood. And as much as it pained him, he had to listen to this part.

“I’m sorry we’re too selfish… I wish it wasn’t like that.”

“You don’t need to apologize.” Jeno assured him, a small smile creeping on his face. “But I can’t let them kill my family… I didn’t spend all these years searching for them to lose them again.”

“I know.”

Neither talked after that.

Until another song was heard. Jeno backed down slightly to turn around, from where the song came from. He looked again at Jaemin, a sad expression displaying on his face.

“I need to go…”

Jaemin only nodded. But he couldn’t find the strength to let him go, again. Jeno moved closer again, and this time cupped both his cheeks in his hands, and slotted their mouths together in a longing kiss.

When they broke apart, Jaemin spoke before he could regret it all his life.

“I love you.”

It made Jeno stop all movements, and looked at him, eyes slightly wide but holding all the fondness Jaemin remember seeing twenty years ago. He came closer again, kissing him with force one more time, one last time.

Before he could disappear in the sea again, he looked at Jaemin one final time.

“I’ll come back on the day we first kiss. I hope you remember what kind of moon it was that night.” Jeno told him, winking but his smile was all but tender.

The honey-haired smiled at him, wide. Of course he remembered.

A full moon.

“Also… bring Daemin?”

And he disappeared into the depth of the sea.

Jeno never answered Jaemin’s confession.

But when Jaemin heard a last song filling the air of the starry night, he knew what was Jeno’s answer. 

**Author's Note:**

> [Twitter](https://twitter.com/niconeo3)  
> [curiouscat](https://t.co/e1UnChL5kj)  
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